Wednesday, 24 May 2017

The Worst Thing About Being in a Lesbian Couple!

Wait! Maybe it's the worst thing about living in a long haired lesbian couple, rather than all lesbian couples - but it's the amount of hair, everywhere!

I have spent many years analysing this and my conclusion is based on many factors. It can be debated of course, but in my personal opinion the worst thing about being in a lesbian couple is the amount of hair.
So much hair!
If you are a woman, or have ever lived with a woman, you will know just how much hair gets everywhere. In a shower not only does it clog up the shower plug it sticks to the walls, your body, it follows you out of the shower and lands on every part of the floor- it just doesn't quit.

Then once your out of the shower more will fall out when you brush your hair, when you dry your hair in fact the only way for a brief respite is if you tie it up. Although when you take it down that will of course encourage more hair to flee from your head.

Not only does this happen at home frequently it happens anywhere and everywhere!

Am I the only one whose head decides it time to malt in hotter climes?! I mean my hair will happily leave me to remain on pillows, bedding, sinks, floors  and even more so on holiday- it's almost as if it can't wait.

In my office it's all over my desk and chair, oh and my clothes. it's like it's job is to slowly but surely malt and find a resting place.

The thing is when living with another woman the hair thing is doubled! I mean at any given point our carpet has a top layer of hair no matter how often I clean it. Walking up stairs you can spot hairs, laying on the couch you can spot hairs, hell even eating you can spot hairs.

Now don't get me wrong this is a whinge and I know that, I mean if it was REALLY that bad we could shave our heads but the thing is neither of us really see that look for ourselves. And we are GRATEFUL to have full heads of hair..... don't get me wrong! We just wish it would stay on our heads instead of everything around us.

To try and cope we have invested in devices - tangle teasers, soft brushes, better conditioner all to try and combat the attack of the hair. Sadly though nothing works. Is there anyone with any other suggestions?!

There is a benefit though, the exercise when cleaning. I mean you can hoover hair, well I mean you can try but even the powerful vacuum we invested in eventually decided 'nah leave the hair'. It means before vacuuming I  have to get on my hands and knees and rub the carpet - small circles seem best - to get the the hair up. Thank god the dog doesn't shed!

It takes ages - I occasionally get blisters on my fingers but it does feel like a great arm work out. Just not one I necessarily want.

As Laura's hair reaches new lengths she now ties it up to stop me suffocating on it at night but that only helps slightly. And I still need to de-hair her before she leaves for work as once the hair is released in the morning it starts to flee.....again.

Geez I've even seen our hair on Bisbee.

So there you have it, or should that be 'hair' you have it ;) the worst thing about being in a (long-haired) lesbian couple is the amount of HAIR!

The rest of it is amazing! I mean there's all these reasons for a start:

So on balance I think we'll cope - we might need to invest in a new vacuum! 

1 comment:

  1. Oh yes! I get this. I have long hair, my 3 daughters have long hair (but one of them doesn't live at home), our cat has long hair too.
    The shower plug and the hoover are the most affected by all the hair!
    Oh by the way.....the cat doesn't use the shower! 🤣


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